Sunday, October 4, 2009

July 24, 2008

(copy/paste from myspace)

It became pretty obvious our little boy was not going to arrive into this world without the help of some drugs! However, making it to Thursday seemed like FOREVER! (Especially since I had pains all week but none of them were effective enough to throw me into labor.)

So Wednesday night, Lance and I rechecked our bags that had been packed for a month, found the cords for the DVD recorder, charged the batteries to the camera, rechecked the car seat once again, made a checklist for the morning and put our cell phones on the charger. We had to leave our house at 3:15 am to make it to our induction time at 4:00 and we did not want to be putting things together in the morning.

I had plans for us to take Tylenol PM (per Dr Deem's okay) around 6:00 Wednesday night and hopefully be out by 7:00. But of course I found 87 more things to do and clean instead. My mom and sister and her friend came to stay the night too and they didn't show up until after 9:30 so my plans didn't really work. Once we finally went to bed and got to sleep (midnight-ish), Lance's phone rang around 12:45. It was his dad who was too anxious to sleep and assumed probably were too. Sweet… But then we had to start the whole process again of getting back into dream land again. And 2:30 came early.

Of course I got up and took a shower; I even dressed cute even though I had to change into a gown 4 seconds after we arrived. And I put my makeup on.

We loaded into the Tahoe and lance said, "Someone already called your phone wishing us luck"… I said "who?" I mean it was 3:15 in the morning and I HOPE his dad had finally gone to sleep by now! So I checked my voice mail and it was the hospital, "We are going to have to cancel you today… we have too many here in active labor now… please call back later to reschedule…" NO. no. NO! There is no such thing as rescheduling at this point. I am SIX DAYS past my due date. I have only slept a couple of hours. I have prepared for this to be THE day. I AM NOT RESCHEDULING!!

So I called them and lied and said we were almost there and live an hour away and didn't know if we had to turn around or what?! They said to head on and they would reschedule the induction scheduled after me but I would have to wait once I checked in.

Lance and I had to drive about 85 mph to make up for my lied time but we didn't have to wait at all. We were put right into our room and started filling out all of our paper work. My nurse also put in my dreaded IV. (I worried way more about getting my first IV then I did pushing an 8 ½ pound child out of a 10cm hole in my private part. And I wish I could say it wasn't that bad but it was. It was bad. And I hated it.)

They started running me some fluids and around 6:30 and then she started my Pitocin. They increased it after about 15 minutes but I still couldn't feel my contractions. At this point I thought, "Oh- labor isn't so bad."

Then after another 20-30 minutes of that, they came in and stopped my medication, and said they had to CANCEL ME AGAIN!!! They just had 3 women walk in, in active labor and they didn't have enough man power to handle the L&D today. So here we go again… I felt like begging at this point, "Please let me stay!!" But they did. They had to! 1. Because my body kept contracting even after they stopped my Pitocin drip. And 2. because Dr. Deem came in and broke my water even though the nurse wasn't too happy about it—there was no sending me home now… I'm in like Flynn!

For a while anyway.

Right until the REAL contractions started. Oh my Lordy. I thought I couldn't do it another contraction. But I did… over and over and over again while my nurse SLOWLY went and got me some pain medicine, Stadol. (It felt like forever.) I tried to tell her I had never had any pain medicine stronger than Tylenol but I was asleep before I even finished my sentence! For 30 minutes I slept better than I have in my life. But at the end of that 30 minute period I woke up in a blaze of glory! I was hurting again… but worse. It was the craziest drug. I would sleep for 60 seconds, then wake up and feel every bit of my 90 second contraction and then go straight back to sleep again as soon as my contraction ended.

All I know is that it felt like I was in constant, horrible pain since I was sleeping in between contractions. And every time I would wake up I was hurting, and the monitor was out of paper and was squealing in my ear, and Lance was text messaging. I was telling myself… don't yell at him, don't yell at him… but my mom said I was looking at him like the devil every time I would wake up!

And that is when I wanted my epidural. Yesterday. And all I kept getting was, "10 more minutes and he'll be here." That kept me okay for about 4 contractions but then I started telling Lance to go find him. He was trying to convince me that the anesthesiologist was on his way but that wasn't good enough. I told him to stand in the hall way so he knew we needed him now. I'm not sure what Lance did but my doctor finally came! He happened to be about 8 foot tall wearing about 8" thick glasses. (FYI: I tried to talk the doctor I work for into setting me up a MRI to check the length of my spinal cord about a month before to make sure it wasn't abnormally long and could be hit and paralyze me and now I am stuck with a man who is blind!) Not only that but he talked slower than anyone I have ever spoke to in my life. Lance said he was getting nervous for the guy and started thinking, "speed it up dude, or she's about to loose it on you!"

But thank God for the Stadol because they usually try to insert it during a contraction so you don't feel it but he could shoot at anytime with me because when I wasn't contracting I was snoring so I didn't even know it happened. It was over. My pain was gone. And I was in love with the man I had cussed just a few minutes earlier!

Life was so good at that point. I woke up to talk occasionally. But mostly I slept.

Until it was time to push!

I could still move my feet with the epidural. And I could still feel some pressure but it didn't hurt.

Dr. Deem got me into position and I started pushing. I pushed and pushed. And then was told to stop. --"we'll just to give him a little break."

Dr Deem and my nurse Amy were trying to play things cool but I could tell something was wrong. I am not an L&D nurse but I did about triple the rotations through that department in nursing school because I loved the area. I also was there during the delivery with my cousin Amber and her baby Kyleigh at this same hospital. Typically there is your doctor, your nurse, your baby's nurse and whoever you have chosen to be in there with you in the room. But all of the sudden my room was being bombarded with a million people. I was crying begging them to tell me why she had to page the respiratory team and why the anesthesiologist was back in my room, and who the other 87 people were but she kept trying to tell me that they always have this many people. LIARS!! Then she was winking at the nursery nurse telling her to page Dr. Guthrie and Dr. Hayward because they would be so excited that he was finally here. Again, I was getting pissed… Does she not realize I take the pages when there is a crashing baby? I understand that they were trying to keep my stress level down but they should've realized I am a control freak and HAVE to know EXACTLY what is going on.

After putting me on oxygen she told me that I could start pushing again. I had a mirror so I could see the process and at this point I made up my mind that the quicker I got him here the sooner I could see what was wrong myself.

And there he came. Blue as could be. Evidentially, I had a contraction that last 4 minutes and cut off his oxygen supply. He also had the cord around his little neck twice.

Prior to pushing Dr. Deem asked Lance if he was going to cut the cord and he said yes but he didn't get to because things were moving so fast. She cut the cord and handed him to respiratory who started bagging our little man and got him crying.

I was hysterical as you can imagine. I was bawling like I have never cried because more than anything I wanted off of that table and over to my little boy to do whatever I could (probably nothing) to help out the situation. I kept asking for his Apgar and no one would tell me. That was because it was 5! A FIVE?!?! It quickly changed to a 9 so he perked up rather quickly. And I was finally able to hold my precious angel.

This is the part on the video tape that I can't watch. It is pathetic. I am wailing out loud and then I promise him that I won't always be that crazy. –I lied.

From then on, the roller coaster of emotions didn't stop. I can not remember a time in my life that I was so happy but cried so much! I cried when everyone passed my baby around even though I made them all sanitize before they held him. I called the nursery one night and asked the nurse if he was crying because I could hear him through the phone. I cried when they told me that if I sent him to the nursery and he cried that they would give him a pacifier or formula. I am solely breastfeeding. Nipple confusion is real and you should stay away from those things until you are sure he has the latching and sucking part down. I cried watching Lance cry. I cried when we had to stay another day because my blood pressure was so high. I cried the next day when we were told again that we would have to stay for the same reason but don't worry that I cried also when he said that we could go home Saturday evening!

Lance and I cried our entire drive home and I cussed at a few cars that drove to close too us.
During my hard contractions I remember asking Lance why some people have 5 and 6 kids because I didn't think I could ever do this again… but the very same night I told him I already missed being pregnant and would do it again and again… It is crazy how that all works out!

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