Monday, April 28, 2014

Beckham is three

Beckham is three.

There are days when it feels like forever.
Not only long and hard and never-ending....
but like a soul that I have known my entire life-- or maybe even before I was born.

Somehow he wiped away the anxieties I had the first go around,
and though he refused sleep his first few months on this earth...
We stuck together--
nursing and chatting...
and he would look directly into my eyes, listening, like he knew me too.

One was a hard year for me...
and him too.
He couldn't talk and I didn't adjust and there were many days I thought I was failing him.
That seems like a million years ago now,
and though I honestly feared that he and I wouldn't have the bond I have with Maddox,
it feels crazy to admit that now.

We click.

I admittedly wanted him to be a girl.
I dreamed of bows and glitter and fingernail polish.
But he completes me.
This boy.
Who is 100% boy.
With his daddy's brown eyes, my brother's blonde hair, and his mommy's determination...
And has since the day he came home.

I am sure that girls are just precious,
but there is nothing I love more than soaking up the play between these two.
I picture God raising his eyebrows while I watch them at work,
like, "I got you.  I always have."
because it is honestly better than diamonds dipped in gravy.

Beckham is the ying to Maddox's yang.
I have never seen two humans that love each other like they do.
Like they have, since the day that they met.

Maddox makes the plans and Beckham takes action.
Maddox asks permission and B makes it happen.
Maddox showers me with compliments and kisses,
Beaky loves my soul with magnetic energy.

I fear sending Maddox to school because he is truly Beckham's right hand and best friend on this earth.
Seriously, we have to get on to Maddox for kissing Beckham too much.
Like in the middle of his baseball games... or when Beckham is already asleep.
"but he just can't help it", he tells us, "he just loves that little guy."
And we do too.

Beckham is perceived by most as quiet and a thinker...
spending his time building, doing, creating, working...
almost unseen, and never far from Maddox.

He is also ornery, assertive, and headstrong.
Almost impossible to sway once his mind is made up.
A quality that I adore.
I truly believe he is capable of moving mountains one day,
if he chooses to use that energy for good.

Three years feels like minutes.
And also a lifetime.
A depth of love that there aren't enough words to describe.
And a infinity of love.

We had a small little party at home with the people who mean the most to us,
and it was just perfect.

He is perfect.
I love him so...

Every second of every minute, since the day I found out we were pregnant.
My tiny.
He is three.


April is one we will remember.
And one day I will write about it... 
but for now I have too many blessings filling my plate that I would rather document than give time to a sloth disguised as a friend or his weasel of a sidekick.

Door after door has been opened, and blessings are pouring out.
God is good... all of the time...
and sometimes his treasures are hidden in the darkest days and unexpected times.

I am way behind though,
so expect lots of pictures.

Of outside, where we love to be...

Waking up every day, like this is their job.

Playing with our friends in Argyle.

6" of change.  And a little color too.


Birthday brunch with my loves at Esperanzas on my actual birthday.

And a dinner date with my husband at Simply Fondue that night.

A visit with Papaw, Granny, and Lance's uncle Darryl.

Beckham woke up one day as a three year old.

And we enjoyed a day of jumping and pho noodles to celebrate.

We watched tv on a tree that night, while enjoying sandwiches and smores.  Compliments of their daddy. 

I jumped back into the office world of nursing... for the company I love-- after just one phone call, because they're pretty amazing like that.

A transfer of 4 wheelers worth documenting.

A visit to the doctor, which ended with a negative strep test...

And impromptu air show on the way home, catching the Blue Angels practice for their real deal.

Beckham's birthday party.
Our trip to Gruene with some great friends.

And being back home, right where we like to be.

 Right where our heart's at.

Forever, and ever, and always.


Tuesday, April 15, 2014


I think it claims that I love surprises down there in the 'about me' section.
Don't believe it.
It's a lie.

My friend Chrissi tried throwing me a surprise party in the 7th grade and I threw such an ugly fit, that she spilled the beans and we both ended up crying.

I almost did the same thing to my marriage.

I hate it.

See, I had asked Lance if he cared if I went to dinner with my girlfriends on my birthday since it falls on a Friday.
He acted offended and said that he wanted to spend that day with me on my 30th.
He told me that he already had something planned and it was a secret.
However, he then went on to mention 4 other things over the last couple of weeks that he would "like to do" that same night...  none being about me.
like his softball game...
cooking out...

Each time, I would say, "so are we not doing anything?..." and he would back track and say that we were.

He is notorious for telling me "what he was going to do" and I finally told him that I was going to be so offended if I passed up an opportunity of a GNO for him to come home from work Friday saying, "I don't care what we do....  are you hungry?" and we tiddle around here talking about it and end up at Chilis.

I took it another step, and stalked his texts to find nothing--
which made me question my FBI skills...
and sanity.

I was so annoyed with him that I never thought twice about my sister asking if we could have a girls' day this Sunday. Actually, I spent our entire drive to the restaurant trying to figure out what he had up his sleeve and trying to make my sister tell me if he really had something planned and just kept pretending to forget so that he could call me a ratchet B once it all fell into place--
or if he really had nothing planned but was just being a jerk and not wanting me to have a night with my pals?

She had nothing.

I worked Sunday and didn't leave the office until 2:00.
She was a little panicky because she said we had reservations and had to leave my house by 3:30.

I assumed the reservation was for pedicures but I was wrong.

I walked into the restaurant to a table full of my most precious friends,
And like I have done about everything else linked to turning 30, I cried.

I love them.
Each of them, separately, for a variety of reasons.
I am truly blessed in the pal department--
and there were others not there that I could even add to the list.

We left there for painting and drinks at Art Happens.
It is owned by my high school art teacher and was an awesome time.

And the fact that Amanda was so terrible at it, made our time hysterical...
like I have belly laughed at least once a day since, just thinking about it-- hysterical.
I mean honestly.
The girl can sing like a bird and taught herself how to play the guitar...
but soak this in a minute...

And she honestly tried.

We had a little after-party at our house...
trampolines, PB&Js, and porch talk.

 And I was gifted some pretty amazing presents too.

I had an incredible night and was completely surprised.

Al pulled it off!
What a cool sister I have!

30 is only 3 days away.
SURPRISE... I am still not ready!