Monday, April 16, 2012

It feels like home.

This was one of my favorite weekends in a long time.

But I will be honest, it got off to a bumpy start.
Friday my kids could not get it together.
I remember being quite overwhelmed... but 3 days later, I can't tell you why.

Well, I do remember the tack that pierced straight through the bottom of my foot... not quite into my heel (into the tougher meat) and not into the arch of my foot (where I would have to have called Care Flight to survive it) but directly in between.  It hurt... really bad.  And it went in, flush, so I had to muster up the courage and pull it back out.
I cussed and cried.
Maddox cried.
I am not sure Beckham stopped crying on Friday, so it is safe to say that he cried with us, as well.

When I feel like I am losing at home, I load up and head out.

And in this case, it was to the mall.

Lance met me when he got off and we had a great time together.

I went in search for smaller shorts-- that didn't fit like underwear-- but we left with some of the best popcorn I have ever eaten (buffalo wing flavor) and four pairs of shoes.

Slow your roll... they were CHEAP!
(like one pair was $5.)

Saturday we went to my nephew's baseball game.
His team did so good,  he did awesome-- and Maddox was over-joyed to watch him play.

Maddox insisted we make Dane a sign, and though I was afraid it would embarrass him-- I was wrong!!
Dane was grinning so big when he saw his fans in the crowd!

After the game, we went to my BFF's little girl's 5th birthday party.

We laughed, we talked and our kids played so hard.
[you know I love my Wendy.]

Sunday, Lance had to work.

We had another birthday party for sweet baby Gracelyn.

Kimberly bought the cake from Creme De La Creme, and it was beyond amazing.
I still can not get over, however, that our tiny baby infants-- are one.
Well mine's not...
He has a few more days.
And within that 6 days period, when someone asks how old he is... you can bet your bottom dollar I will answer, "eleven months."
I am holding on, y'all!

So.. back home, we waited for Lance.

Our neighborhood has a community FB page and a man posted about trying to get together for a recreational softball game.

Lance loves softball.
{But Lance loves any sport, honestly.}

So as hard as he tried to push for the game to be on Saturday, he lost and it was set for Sunday.

Due to rain, earlier in the day, the game was pushed back to 5:00 and Lance was so excited to get to play.

Me and the boys loaded into the stroller and walked down to watch.
Other moms were there with their kids too...
some played.
For my husband's sake, this mom, did not.
He's the one in the back with his hand up.

Lance made a couple of good catches and I heard someone joke that it was going to make it into the highlight real... in which I laughed-- "more like the Advil bottle."
I know he is going to be so sore today!

We had so much fun, and finally, after living here for 5 years, we met a few of our neighbors.

The craziest thing happened.
We met this couple who were so sweet.
The more we talked, the more we realized we had in common.
Lance and the husband knew quite a few of the same people throughout the firefighting community-- and it seemed we all had a lot in common.
Our kids are the exact same age (their's, both girls) and we started talking about meeting to play sometime.
The mom finally asked my name, and when I told her 'Holly'... she realized that I was the mom who emailed her about child care this summer!

Remember the class that I 'have to have'...
well it is offered this summer and I could knock it out in a month.
My mom told me to go ahead and sign up for it,
although she wasn't quite sure if she could help with with child care just yet.
My sister told me to sign up and she would help me when she could as well...
but doesn't know her schedule to be sure.
I'm sure my Nana would help a day here or there...
Probably Candace and Kimberly too.
But I had responded to this mom's offer, just to have a back-up plan.
(genuinely knowing, I would probably never have the courage to follow through, since I have major trust issues when it comes to my kids!)

But she was so sweet... and I felt so great about the whole ordeal!

I probably can't afford 4 days a week with her, but it was nice to meet her, like her, want to be-friend her... before realizing she was who I had contacted.
Maybe I can use her 2 days a week... and get family-help the other 2, so no one gets burned out!

We left the park, and Lance and the other dads played baseball with the boys outside, while I made dinner.

Just sitting at the table, eating dinner with my little family, I got weepy.

We are most likely never going to be rich...
Or have the nicest of nicest things.
And i am okay with that.

My kids know they are loved.
And for that, I feel blessed beyond measure.

They have a daddy who would rather play cars with them than a round of golf...  who changed careers, not necessarily because he wanted to, but because it was a better quality of life for our kiddos... and a man who has no problems confessing and showing his love for all of us... or changing diapers.

They have a momma, who works the crazy hours that no one else wants, making down to the dime exactly what she has to make, to get by...  turning down more hours, for more time with the boys.  Who works hard to keep a clean house, laundry done, and happy bellies.

We understand life is easier when there is more money in your bank account. 
(Believe me, we have lived on both sides of this margin)  But somewhere in the middle seems to work best for us.

Our boys have parents who have chosen "time together" over bigger paychecks, many times...
because to us, it is more important.

Lance just laughs and rubs my back when I get misty eyed and can't explain it.

I don't really know why I loved this weekend so much, except...
it just felt like home.


  1. I love this post Holly. I love that feeling that you are describing here, I know it well, but I honestly haven't felt it in a while. Some days I just feel like I'm on the edge of a breakdown. I would take somewhere in the "middle" right about now as far as money and work hours for Kevin and his time away from us.

    Boyd and I were at McDonald's the other day and a little boy ran up to his daddy who was next to us and he was saying, daddy daddy did you see what I did? Did you see me? Dad? Dad?

    .....and the dad didn't look up once, just kept texting and said, are you ready to go.

    And I just wanted to cry. I don't ever want Boyd to feel like me or Kevin don't have time for him. I don't want us to ever be too busy or be working too much. A balance is hard to find, but it sounds like you have got it right.

    I just felt the need to tell someone that story.

  2. ps. I know what you mean about telling everyone your baby is 11 months, not one year old. A few weeks before Boyd turned 4, my mom was telling everyone he was 4, and I kept correcting her. I didn't like it. :)

  3. Me again. I'm not stalking you. I forgot to add, I would eat that popcorn too. It sounds delicious!

  4. Hi Holly, this post is so touching. I admire you so much for how hard you work and your love for your family is a beautiful thing. You have the right perspective...thanks for sharing this!

    BTW, your boys are just adorable...

  5. Oh Holly. Those moments with your boys are precious. You will NEVER regret passing up material things for time. (that is experience talking since Hunter is 17 and about to be a Senior!) You are so blessed!