Tuesday, December 20, 2011

I hate it.

My friend Candace and I have an on-going joke about me hating things.

A few years back, we had gone to Canton and we saw a booth selling those beaded hair ridiculous accessories that were in mall kiosk for about a minute...
Without much thought, I said, "I hate those things.  I hate them in the mall, and I hate them here."
We laughed because I was so passionate about my hatred for a hair clippy.

Since then, we joke about having a board on Pinterest titled, "I hate it."
But just as soon as I think something is awful, one of my friends have pinned it onto their board of ideas, so I have refrained from my negative-Nancy board of hating-ness.

This post is all in good fun... 
{but true.}


I hate...
  • hair that isn't attached to the head. And in the manner that mine is falling from my scalp right now, this is a problem.
  • that McDonalds now charges for sweet and sour sauce. what?
  • when people drive slow in the left lane... or have a crazy blinker that blinks way too fast.
  • that someone told me that jello was made from crushed bones... I obviously can't eat it now.
  • peppermint flavored anything... especially if it is mixed with chocolate.
  • when people without kids, offer parenting advice.  [I don't care how many nieces or nephews you have... I don't care that you get paid to take care of kids or if you have a college degree in the growth and development of children.  I don't care that you are 100 months pregnant with your first child, or have read every book about parenting.  Until you have birthed a human, cried on their bedroom floor sure that you are doing everything wrong-- and then in the same week thought about writing a book because you are so damn good at it... zip it.]
  • pale pink.
  • when I am busting a rhyme, dropping it like it's hot and whipping my hair like a wild woman by myself in my car and I make eye contact with another car.
  • when my favorite trashy tv show doesn't record.
  • that I had my Keurig for an entire year, and was not really a fan of it at all, before finding out that you can make 4 cups of coffee off of 1 k-cup.  [and that they make a re-usable kcup to fill with my own brand of coffee.]
  • when I have a sweet tooth, and have nothing to bake.  ...so I mix butter and powered sugar and cocoa and eat it with a spoon, and call it icing. {that I am so unhealthy}
  • off centered- un-matching Christmas lights.
  • scary Halloween decorations.
  • the smell of fish.
  • that I get over 1000 reads per month on my blog but the same 3 people comment.  Yes I am thankful to you few, however-- what the heck are you other 999 doing?  ;)
  • When I think I look cute...and then see a picture of myself and realize that I was wrong.  
  • food with chewy textures.
  • pumping gas
  • spending money on underwear.  (that's why mine are about a decade old... put that in your 'Holly isn't sexy file' if you don't mind)
  • Running out of toilet paper... but not realizing until, you know... you need it. Or-- when the person [husband] before you runs out, and grabs a new roll, but neglects to trash the previous empty roll so the new one sits atop the empty cardboard innards.  {laziness}
  • doing laundry.
  • When public restrooms only have hand driers. [or are filthy]
  • Red lipstick.  [yes I know it is in style.  But I still hate it... and I think you will too when you see yourself in pictures.]
  • that Words with Friends was ruined by Cheats.  [*clears throat* you know who you are ;)]  It was originally fun.
  • well thought out, wordy, dreamy, luscious, face book statuses.  [come'on.]
  • sample sized lotions, shampoos, soaps... junk.  clutter.
  • anything that flies or jumps. 
  • when I am having a good day but feel guilty truly enjoying it because I know that this particular day is someone in the world's very worst day ever.  That's crazy, right?!
  • un-organization.
  • when someone adds you to your FB, so you like their statuses and comment their pictures [because you assume you're friends and all] but they never do yours so you have to wonder if they didn't even mean to be-friend you at all... or if they are just rude?!  
  • to be hot at night.
  • that I wear my feelings on my shoulders.
  • checking my voice mail.  So I typically don't. [I just delete them all at once and feel free again.]
  • wrinkled clothing.
  • that I can hear a story about something sad, and let that ruin my entire day, worrying about something that is likely to never happen to me and that I am unable to control if it were. {anxiety}
  • my cell phone that has zero reception in my house.
  • people who are mean to babies. 
  • that I am so nonathletic.
  • that I can be so obnoxious.  [I can even feel myself doing it... but I can't stop it!  --especially if I am nervous or a drop of alcohol has touched my tongue.]
  • when I tell Lance a story and he replies, "that's funny", but doesn't smile or laugh.  {Do tell, sweet husband, how funny was it really?}
  • that I can hear a sad story, and I immediately put myself in their shoes to try and imagine their pain, sadness,  fear, etc... why do I bring those negative feelings on myself? 
  • when I want to be mad but can't help but laugh.  [my husband has mastered this concept in arguing]
  • scary movies.
  • that I wasn't on the jury for the Casey Anthony trial.  I would have hung it.
  • when restaurants only have canned soda.  ...I like about 4 refills... and I don't want to pay for 5 cans, nor do I just want water. [Mi Cocina needs to get with the program!]
  • pickled okra.
  • that white thing in eggs.  I always pick it out.
  • that I miss opportunities to snuggle my babies because I think of a million things to do while sitting.
  • pointless noise.  [ie: the tv during the day]
  • for things to get near my eye ball.  --I think I was scarred by my lasix.
  • when someone calls you but you miss their call and you immediately call them back and they don't answer.  >>Amanda!!
  • when I am enjoying a piece of meat but then imagine the feathers that were once attached to it, or picture myself biting right into a cows leg, and I am done.
  • my bad allergies in January. 
  • driving in anything but pure sunshine.
  • being broke.
  • that you are suppose to clear your mind and breathe during the last 5 minutes of Yoga {:meditate:} but I have no idea how to do that!  I end up thinking so hard about not thinking, that I was better of just thinking about all of the things that I still need to accomplish that day.
  • the music to Law and Order.
  • that I am so far behind this Christmas.  I actually did get my Christmas cards... but they are still sitting in the bag, unaddressed.
  • Chuck.E.Cheese
  • looking at rad blogs and dreaming of how awesome I could make mine... but then realizing that it would be a blog for everyone else at that point and not what this was originally intended to be.  So it stays un-rad... and small... and me.
  • that we didn't get pictures taken this year before Christmas.  Each time I see someone post new ones, I get sad.  And jealous.
  • that I let an idea of what I think is going to happen, steal my happiness sometimes, when reality sets in-- and I have once again set my expectations way too high.
  • toys with lots of pieces. 
  • leftovers.
  • that I treat Lance like a friend more than a husband.  It is our marriage biggest asset and largest downfall as well. 
  • when people want you to vote for their kid on something... I don't 'do' pageants... and I don't vote against kids.  I think they're all cute, and I am not really into popularity contests.
  • milk.  Unless it is ice cold and served with something chocolaty and hot!  [in that case, I love it.]
  • when Maddox correctly pronounces a word, that he has always said incorrectly.  {growing up.}
  • Spam, pork rinds, potted meat, liver.... you know, nasty meat.
  • that I can not go to sleep at night-- therefor I wake tired every single morning.
  • that I can remember people by their hair style or their job... and even their handwriting!!!  But I am horrible with names.  Terrible.
  • the texture of red apples and the strings on bananas.
  • heartburn.
  • junk mail.
  • that I didn't go back to school before I had kids.
  • the rush before the holidays.
  • that "cleaning" is never done.
  • that I loose sleep over the home I'd love to build with rooms upon rooms for kids who need a better life... but know I will never get there.  ...and then I loose sleep over those lost kids.
  • when something that I really want is on sale {black boots at Macy's} but show up a day after the sale is over.[and refuse to pay full price]
  • growing up.
  • that I wrote this so close to Christmas and have set on it a few days, wondering if I should post it.  It took work so I'd hate to trash it but makes me look like a negative Nancy.  Just know that it was written in good-time-fun.  Promise.    And I am happy as a clam. [which happen to be the most blissful, cheerful,  lively, merry, upbeat animals on earth.]  Like me.  ;)

15 comments:

  1. Don't worry about being a Negative Nancy, sometimes we just have to let it out and this really was in good fun. But, I do wonder if I've "pinned" something you don't like! :) I could make a list full of "hates", but then when I got to "I hate driving a car", my list would get 100x longer because I would then have to name the million reasons I hate a car.

    My list would have a lot of the same things, but I do love me some peppermint--especially with chocolate!

    P.S. Thanks, now I have the Law & Order theme song in my head!

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  2. This is great. I love it! Oh, I felt that way about FB, that is why I am off of it. I get my feelings hurt way too often. Definitely a fault of mine, but I can relate to that one, big time!

    Junk mail, hate it, goes right in the shredder. The strings on bananas, same here, made me laugh. The cleaning is never done, and that makes me CRAZY.

    Anyway, could go on and on. Love it!

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  3. Oh this is so funny!
    Loved your honesty!!!!
    Thanks for the laugh tonight. ;)

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  4. Oh Holly I am cracking up! I was reading your list and it went on and on and on...too funny! I loved it. I hate so many of the things you hate! Don't know why so many people like mint chocolate chip ice cream- gross! When people w/o kids offer advice had me rolling! And thinking you look cute and then seeing a picture of yourself from that moment...happened to me on Sunday when we had our santa dinner. Darn camera! I hate too when Brady says something correctly after not all this time- so sad. I hate that we have never had a real family picture taken. And lastly, how do you know how many people read your blog every month? How do you find that out?

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  5. Holly, I think we are the same person. I'm literally "Laughing Out Loud" at your hates. I think all but 2 are the same things I hate....although I could add a ton more. Don't feel bad. I love this post. You are so honest and you say what people want to say, but don't. Keep em' coming!

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  6. Too funny! I'm not great about commenting each time but I am super glad I am not Amanda right now. LOL

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  7. Ummm, Amanda here...remember the earlier sentence that stated your phone gets bad reception?!?! Maybe the call is not coming through!! And if you were yet again implying I cheat on wwf... I swear I don't! There is no rule that you have to define the word!!! And I promise to start commenting your blog more....and to stop wearing beaded clippies ; ). Now, I think I'm in the clear for the rest!!! Peace out, my bff.

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  8. U always crack me up and I just love when I get the email of the new blog!

    Thanks,Candi
    Merry Christmas&Happy New Year!!!!

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  9. Things I hate...

    The Young and the Restless
    Cold toilet seats
    Cats
    Marlboros
    Laundry
    Ingrown toe nails
    Sneezing and blowing out boogers
    Rascal Flats music
    Dial up
    USC

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  10. I think this post is too cute! Just came across your blog and your family is adorable! I hate peppermint flavored anything as well ESPECIALLY with chocolate. My husband thinks my theory behind chocolate and peppermint together is crazy but I don't think the two are suppose to be mixed! Your post was fun and i am so glad I came across it:)

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  11. First of all, I love your "Blog", I read every one over and over, then save them in a folder to read again and again.
    It tells me a little more about my grand daughter. I have wanted to respond to your "I Hate Blog" but had too much stuff to do lately.

    I also hate:
    Cold weather...I hate, hate, hate it!

    Hair that is falling out, not only can you see my scalp but it fills the sink and falls on the floor and then I MUST vacuum it up.

    I don't do McDonalds except for an occasional breakfast, I like their pancakes. But then again I've never seen a bad pancake.

    I don't complain about other peoples driving, just try to get down the road and back home as quickly as possible, and give everyone else the benefit of the doubt that they are trying to do the same thing, plus, Mike does enough complaining about that for both of us. He takes it as a personal insult when they don't drive to suit him.

    Have to think about that Jello thing, kinda gross, huh?

    When it comes to child rearing, I have always said, "I didn't do the best job in the world, just the best job I could do with the skills I was given." I've known people who, I thought, did everything right and still raised some crappy kids and I've known some who were terrible parents and turned out great, successful kids.

    You and I will just have to "agree to disagree" about pale pink. It's just about my favorite color... to wear. I know why you hate it...you have two little boys. Just wait 'til that little baby girl comes along in a few years and you will "think pink" big time.

    Remind me to ask you about that Keurig coffee maker thing tomorrow. Mike and I are thinking about getting one.

    When I have a craving for something sweet, a spoonful of red plum jam or blackberry jelly puts that monster to rest and I get my serving of fruit for the day as well :-)

    I hate trashy Christmas lights too.

    I don't buy expensive, sexy underware, it seems such a waste, but that's just me. I'm such a plain vanilla, no frills kind of Nana.

    I absolutely never run out of toilet paper and Mike is pretty good about putting it on the hanger. Let's face it...us gals use a lot more tp than guys.

    I love it when all the laundry baskets are empty, it gives me such a good feeling, it's worth the effort. I like to think my glass is always half full...maybe three quarters, and it just runs over when the laundry is done.

    I hate all lipstick, and I have never worn it and never will. (See that no frills comments)

    Did I mention I HATE WINTER?

    I'm sorry, I just don't do Face Book.

    I can't resist the sample size shampoo, body wash and conditioner at hotels but hate it when I get home and have no use for them and they collect in the bottom of my bathroom drawer...but you can put them in a zip lock bag and sell them in a garage sale for ten for a dollar. I do do love the cheap shower caps, they make great bowl covers. (When they've never been used, of course)

    I have found there will always be people to worry about and for years tried to help them as best I could. Now I have learned, when a thought comes to mind about a situation I can do nothing about and am not sure of what it would take to help them, I stop and pray to God that 'Thy will be done' in their life. So I guess what I'm saying, when something or someone is heavy on your heart, "pray about". He always answers our prayers...but remember sometime the answer is no.

    My cell phone and I have a 'love/hate' relationship. I hate it and it hates me but I don't think I could survive without it.

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  12. I hate wrinkled clothes too, I even iron my PJs...and I hate to iron. I guess my iron and I have that love/hate thing going on as well. I probably need to pray about that.

    I think there should be a special place in HELL for those who are mean to babies...right next to Hitler...with piped in baby cries, non stop.

    Mike used to think everything I said or did was soooo funny...'till we got married. Guess it is just a "husband" thing. They don't want us to get too sure of ourselves. I've tried praying about...the answer was, "no, just adjust."

    I hate scary movies, suspenseful books and things that go bump in the night, but will sit out in the back porch swing at 2AM and read my NOOK without the lights on in warm weather. Warm weather seems like it was so long ago.

    Did I mention...I HATE WINTER?

    Man could we have hung that Casey Anthony trial up 'til forever. I loved the quote I heard on TV. Someone said, "There's a village in Florida missing 12 idiots" and I agree.

    Don't do soda's at restaurants. They are way over priced and it is a great time for me to drink water which I really try to do as often as I can.

    I am surprised you don't eat pickled okra. You always tried to eat anything your daddy did and he loves it.

    That white stuff in eggs is called a lanyard...it holds the yolk in the middle of the egg. I pick it out too.

    The time you miss rocking or reading or playing with your babies because you need to do do other things is called LIFE. It has always happened and always will. I have tried to rationalize it by telling my self, my kids benefitted by the other things I did for them, a clean house, good home cooked food and helping to make a living for their benefit. Now, I'm not sure that is true but I know me well enough to know, if I had the chance to do it all again, I would probably do it the same way.

    I hate having the TV on all day. I hate TV and I Hate Winter!!!

    I am not crazy about anykind of meat, but I do love bacon.

    I don't have allergies but sympathize with those who do.

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  13. Being broke in America is no fun, being broke in a third world country gives poverty a whole new meaning. I've prayed and prayed about it, I guess God
    sees a reason for it.

    I don't know the first thing about yoga. I sounds like it would be something that would be very good for you but will take a while to master. Hang in thereyou can do it!!!

    I hate Chucky Cheeses too.

    I think your BLOG is rad. I guess that is a good term...you know I'm old.

    I did notice in your Christmas picture, Beckham was a tiny baby. Loved it anyway.

    I love that you married your best friend. I remember at the end of your wedding, they started playing "You Are My Brown Eyed Girl" and big ole tears just ran down my face, I was so happy you had found Lance and he had found you.

    I don't mind buying stuff from my grand kids for school projects, but I hate when neighbor kids come to the door selling stuff for schools I don't have any one that goes to. I need to pray about that too.

    Baby, you are tired in the morning because you have two babies, work a full time job and work hard to keep a neat house. I hate to tell you but it won't change 'til you retire and then everything hurts at night and you feel like a rag when you get up in the morning but can't lay there and sleep. That, sweetie, is called life too.

    I wish you had gone on to school to get your degree before the babies came along, but if you had, Maddox would be a tiny baby now and there would be no Beckham yet. And 'Oh' what you would have missed. And that journal of funny and insightful things Maddox has said would be empty. There will be time later for you to go back. Think positive and pray about it.

    I hate the rush before Christmas too, but one thing I've noticed this year, people (in our area) seem to be so much kinder and polite. Holding the door for you or saying "Thank You" when you hold the door for them. For a month now I have said, "Merry Christmas" to everyone and so far no one has been offended by the word Christmas. Woe to one the one that ever does!!! We get a newsletter in our water bill here in Lakeside. This year there was an item telling about how Town Hall had planted a "Holiday Tree". That gave me a case of the 'red ass' so bad I fired off an e-mail to three of our council members. If it's a 'holiday' tree, then we must decorate it on Memorial Day, the fourth of July, Labor Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas & New Years. They probably thought, "There's Dee Perkins, on her high horse again. Next thing you know she will want us to decorate it on her birthday." Not a bad idea. It's a CHRISTMAS TREE, let's call it a CHRISTMAS TREE. It's the best thing about winter, by now you know...I HATE WINTER!!!


    I too, feel so bad for all the needy kids in world, but know I can't change that. All I can do is try to help the few that I know about. Growing up there were five kids in our family and mom didn't work and as I have told others, we didn't have everything we wanted, but we did have everything we needed. I was raised in a ONE bedroom house. Wanda, Barbara, Geneva and I shared two beds in the bedroom and mom and dad and Henry had two beds in the living room. I don't ever remember being crowded or being deprived. I do know I never went to bed at night hungry or wondering if anyone in the world loved me. That sounds pretty bleak, but we were a big happy family. Mon and dad didn't have much, but everything they had, they gave to us kids. As parents, they didn't do everything right but they did the best they could with the skills they had. And we loved them will all our hearts and I will miss them as long as I live.

    Next blog you put together should be your "I Love List" that should go on forever.

    I sure do love you...
    Nana

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  14. PS...Did I mention, I HATE WINTER!!!
    PS #2...I didn't have time (as you can imagine) to go back and proof read this
    'novel' so ignore all the miss spelled words. OK?

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